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Boyfriend refusing to speak to me after a fight

Asked by Female, 24, In relationship
My boyfriend of 3 years has stopped talking to me after a fight. We live in different cities and he has asked me not to initiate any conversations till we meet next, which is in a week. After I texted him, he has now blocked me. I am afraid that he will not resume communication.
Answer
Thumb komal
Komal
Counseling Psychologist

Hi Writer, thank you for writing in. It takes great courage to reach out for help.

It seems that you are facing difficulty in your relationship with your boyfriend. You both are in a long distance relationship. Due to some reason he has chosen to not talk till he comes down and meets you in person. Although he is coming in a few days but the distance was bothering you and you tried to reach out to him and he ended up blocking you. He perhaps was requesting you for some time and space which was difficult for you to give. This has caused you to fear that you might loose him and the thought of it has been bothering you very much. I understand that it must be a difficult position for you to be in.

Firstly, I would appreciate the courage in you for being able to manage so far. This certainly must not have been easy on you.
Could you tell me a little bit about your relationship? How has the 3 years of being together been so far for you both?
Has the relationship always been a long distance one or have you both stayed in the same cities before?
How often do you both get to meet each other and for how long?
How have you both been coping up with the challenges of a long distance relationship?
If you feel comfortable, would you like to share what led to him not talking to you till he comes to meet you?
How long has it been since this incident has happened?
Has any similar instances happened in the past for you both in this relationship?
What do you think made him block you? How do you feel about that?
What makes you feel so scared that he will stop talking to you at all?
And lastly, how have you been coping up with this so far? What has helped you to keep going? Have you shared this with anyone?
Answering these questions will help me understand your situation better and enable me to guide you accordingly.

Secondly, how would you like me to help you with your situation? What is it that you are hoping to seek through this counselling process?

Please respond back to continue our discussion. Looking forward to hearing from you.
Warm regards.

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