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Dating a guy who does not initiate anything or pay

Asked by Female, 23, Single
I met a guy online and recently went out on a few dates with him. He does not initiate further dates or pay for food. Is this okay?
Answer
Thumb komal
Komal
Counseling Psychologist

Hi Writer, thank you for writing in. It takes great courage to reach out for help.

It seems that you are facing a little situation with your recent date and are confused about his intentions and what your further action should be and what you should make of it. However, he did not offer to pay for the date. Also, he has not called you back like you expected him to and now wonder what to make of it. I understand that it must be a confusing position for you to be in at this point.

What about him makes you like this guy?
How serious are you about him?
What else about his reaction post the date seems quite different to you?
Apart form paying the bill, what else makes you think that he expects you to always initiate?
What has he promised to you so far?
Is this your first such online experience of meeting a person?
Answering these questions will help me understand your situation better and enable me to guide you accordingly.

How would you like me to help you with your situation? What is it that you are hoping to seek through this counselling process?

Please respond back to continue our discussion. Looking forward to hearing from you.
Warm regards.

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