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Disturbed by husband's disinterest in intimacy, weight loss, excessive crying

Asked by Female, 25, Married
My husband is not interested in intimacy. I am disturbed, have lost weight, and cry most nights.
Answer
Thumb komal
Komal
Counseling Psychologist

One enters into marriage with dreams of hoping to start a new journey with their partner that is filled with love and happiness. For a happy and successful marriage, both partners need to be equally invested to work towards it. With the basic love and communication not in place for a strong foundation, anything that is built upon it will turn out to be shaky, especially at an engagement phase. This is certainly not why someone enters into a marriage. I can imagine your pain and agony.

Sexual need is as strong a need as thirst or hunger. We are sexual beings and it is only natural that when these needs are not met by our partners or if we are not able to fulfil them, we are filled with feelings of frustration that affects other aspects of our life and leave us angry, grumpy and unsatisfied or even devastated in life.

To begin with, it would help for you to explore reasons behind why your husband is not interested in being intimate with you. To help you with figuring that out, I'm sharing with you an article that you might find useful to gain some insight and what you can do about it:
https://www.askmile.com/blog/sexual-problems-ruining-marriage-10-tips-experts-to-reignite-sex/
https://www.askmile.com/blog/sex-therapy-what-is-it-and-who-can-benefit-from-it/

Work on building healthy emotional connect and communication with your husband. This will help build intimacy. Talk to him about what is disturbing you and suggest ways how he can help you with it. Once you are feeling emotionally better, your appetite, weight and mood will gradually fall in place.
Also, reach out to your close trusted ones in friends and family to support you through this difficult time. Speaking with a counsellor/ therapist will help you deal with this effectively and efficiently.

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