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How to balance between different personalities of spouses?

Asked by Female, 24, Married
My husband is sensitive and takes things personally, but I am a free-spirited person. How do we manage this?
Answer
Thumb komal
Komal
Counseling Psychologist

Hi Writer, thank you for writing in. It takes great courage to reach out for help.

It seems that you are facing difficulty in your marriage with regard to finding a balance and matching with your partner on levels of emotional sensitivity and compatibility and it frustrates you when he ends up getting hurt by taking things personally. I understand that it must be a difficult position for you to be in.

Firstly, I would appreciate the courage in you for being able to manage so far.
Could you tell me more about what you mean when you say that you are a free spirited person and that your husband is sensitive? It would help if you could give me instances of when this typically happens and how you both respond and handle such situations. How often does this happen?
Since when has this happened and what do you think could be the reasons for this? It would help if you could give me a background about both your families and upbringing.
Was it an arranged or love marriage? Anyone else who lives with you in the house?
What do you both do? A little bit about both of your social circles too.
What about this leaves you frustrated and irritated?
What has helped you both cope with this so far? How do you both manage?
Answering these questions will help me understand your situation better and enable me to guide you accordingly.

Please respond back to continue our discussion. Looking forward to hearing from you.
Warm regards.

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