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How to balance each other's careers?

Asked by Female, 26, In relationship
In a relationship with this guy from work and I decided to tell our parents and get married. We work in an IT firm. He wants to quit IT and go back to his home town and take care of the family business. Whereas, I want to be in a different city and continue working in IT. This is where we are not able to synchronize. Neither he nor I am ready to compromise and we're not able to let go of our relationship. We're stuck. It's been months since we told our parents but nothing has advanced yet. Business is his passion and IT is mine. It won't be fair on either of our parts to ask the other to sacrifice on this. What to do?
Answer
Thumb komal
Komal
Counseling Psychologist

Hi Writer, thank you for writing in. It takes great courage to reach out for help.

It seems that you are facing difficulty in making a decision with regard to your place of stay with your husband after marriage. You both are passionate towards your profession as well as want to make this relationship work. I understand that it must be a difficult position for both you and your partner to be in wherein you feel that you are made to make a choice between your career and your relationship, both of which you equally value, and you cannot seem to make that difficult a choice.

Firstly, I would appreciate the courage in you for being able to manage so far since the past two months. Surely it isn’t easy given that you are finding it difficult to sleep as you seem to be struggling in trying to find a solution to your situation.

Secondly, how would you like me to help you with your situation? What is it that you are hoping to seek through this counselling process?

Please respond back to continue our discussion. Looking forward to hearing from you.
Warm regards.

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