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My girlfriend is not showing enough seriousness or love towards me. Listening to her rich dad, busy in shopping!

Asked by Male, 19, Single

My girlfriend is of 17 years. She is rich. Recently her father came to know about us. One evening I kept calling her and her father got annoyed. He kept us apart for 2 whole days without letting her use her phone. But she won't revolt against her father as she is his favorite daughter. If this would have been my mother. I would have fought hard to talk to her. She says she will revolt soon. Till now I was ready to sacrifice everything for her. But now my confidence is shattered. She understands this problem. But I too want her to show her love for me. While we were not talking her father being rich took her to shopping to recover her mood but I felt like shit this whole time. While I was feeling pathetic she was enjoying buying dozens of dresses as they will be going on a holiday. Actually I am giving my exams and now we are in a transition period where we mostly stay at home and study. She is having her vacations but her parents are always at home so meeting is a dream. She wants to keep both me and her father happy. Is her attitude correct for our love? I intend to marry her and she too wants but I just feel after all this that she is immature. Soon I will be going out for further studies and this will be converted into a long distance relationship. I guess if she had revolted then her father would have understood her love for me. We are in relationship for 6 months and we are really serious about each other. What should I do to make her more serious about our relation and make her realize that love is more important than materialistic things like dresses and ice creams which I know her father will use as bribe to replenish the feeling of missing me?

Answer

Dr. Joseph

Counseling Psychologist

Message Dr. Joseph

Answered over 4 years ago

Hello,
Thank you for reaching out to the askile team with your concerns and struggles in keeping your relationship alive. I understand you are 19 and she is 17. You are troubled by the fact that you are not getting enough attention and affection from her though you have shown so much commitment to this relationship with her. You are even willing to abandon your family for being with her and you expect the same from her. At some point she told you she would revolt against her father to be with you. What does that mean? She is only 17, still a minor. Now both of you plan to go to different cities / countries for your further study and you are aware that for a few years you may have to satisfy with a long distance relationship. If you consider that as a natural process and wait for a few years who knows she would revolt against her father for being with you. At this point, at the age of 17, still in the high school study she has not come to that level of revolt. What would she gain by revolting now?
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