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My parents opposing Hindu Muslim marriage, asking my guy for Islam conversion!

Asked by Female, 25, Single
I am a Muslim girl dating a Hindu boy. We have missed major relationship milestones because of my strict upbringing. In-spite of our hurdles, he asked me to marry him, I agreed happily. But, not without letting him know that it's not going to be easy because of my family. It's been a year since our parents know about us. While his parents have reluctantly come to accept his choices, my parents will only agree if he converts to Islam. The day he proposed to me, he has told me that he would convert if need be. Now, he has slowly changed his mind. It's been a year and a half since our battle to be married started. My life has been at a standstill for this long. But, I've been okay with it as long as it grants us the happy ending we both wanted. Now, his major concern is having feeling avoid of separation from me. He avoids topics of marriage and never has enough time to even text me. I understand that he works very hard. But, even when he's free, he never has the sense of urgency to speak to me. I've been trying to keep communication open between us, but he goes quiet while we are having a conversation. Everything feels very forced and one sided at this point. I never forced him to have to convert. I've told him we could elope if the situation warrants it. He doesn't want to dishearten his parents by converting and hurting their sentiments. I respect this. But, I've been doing nothing but vehemently opposing and disheartening my parents for a year and a half because I love him and would go to any lengths to be with him. But, I don't feel he is as committed as I have been. Instead of focusing on marriage to bridge the distance, his main concern is having missing out on the perks of having a girlfriend. I am at a loss here. I don't know what to think or feel. Just when I thought we were going strong, he opens up and voices his concerns which are polar opposite of the stage I'm at. We are just not on the same page anymore. No amount of communication has been helping our situation. It's such a mess that I strongly feel depressed.
Answer
Thumb dr. joseph george new
Dr. Joseph
Counseling Psychologist

Hello,
Thanks for reaching out to the askmile team with your concerns and struggles on your relationship with this man who is from Hindu background. It is a tough thing that things are not moving in the direction you expected. Both of you dated, he proposed, and you agreed, in spite of knowing that your family is not going to consent your marriage with a Hindu man. There was also the discussion about he converting to Islam to marry you. Since then, you feel he is moving away from you. Communication from his end drastically reduced. Whenever you call him there is no eagerness and enthusiasm from his side in creating pleasant communication. He appears to be going away from you but you are struggling hard to keep it alive and see whether you can marry him. You also feel the process has become more one sided now. Please get back to us with a few more details.

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