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Possessive, short-tempered, uncaring husband

Asked by Female, 32, Married
My husband lied to me about his age before marriage. He is short-tempered, possessive, and does not love me or spend quality time with me. I am staying in the marriage only because of our child.
Answer
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Garima
Counseling Psychologist

Your marriage seems to have taken a very unfortunate turn. You're ability to hold on in a situation where you receive nothing is commendable.
However, in the long run this may not be the best for you. Staying in a marriage for the sake of your child usually doesn't benefit the parent or the child. Watching parents in a loveless marriage is one of the most difficult things for a child.

In my opinion, you can try communicating your needs and expectations to your husband and talk about his temper issues as well. Maybe having a formal and direct conversation about how unhappy this marriage is for you and that you want to make some decisions for your future and that of your child's may compel him to take a hard look at his behavior.
You can also suggest seeking professional help for him to deal with his temper and/or you both could seek help to navigate your marriage onto smooth waters.

However, if none of this works, I suggest you take sometime for yourself and think about your priorities ( your happiness and your child) and see how you can make decisions that are happy and healthy for you both in the long run.
A relationship is a two-way street. If your husband doesn't want to get on board to salvage your marriage, then you should as yourself if it's worth staying in a loveless marriage.
Please also consider getting sound legal advice on the matter since you have a child and his/her future can be deeply affected if things don't go down concretely.

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