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Should I accept my wife if she had a pre-marital relationship?

Asked by Male, 24, Single
My fiance confessed to having a relationship with a guy. Should I accept her?
Answer
Thumb komal
Komal
Counseling Psychologist

Well, this depends on your values and what you need. Sounds to me like you are having difficulty trusting and accepting her.
Your fiance is an individual who has a right to her life and entitled to having her own past just as you are entitled to having yours. She choose to tell you about it, although it was up to her to disclose it or not. This could mean that she wishes for you to know about her, her life and her past and be a part of it. She was honest with you although she had a choice to keep it from you. In my opinion, there's nothing wrong in having had a past.

However, if it is against your principles, values and beliefs, it is entirely up to you to decide if her past is strongly important enough for you to break the relationship off with her, or is your relationship more worthy than her past?
Ask yourself what are your concerns with her having had a past?
Will you be able to move past this, accept it and her, trust her and be able to work on building a relationship with her despite that?
If the answer is no, ask yourself the reason for it. Would you like to/ want to and wish to overcome it?
If the answer is yes, ask yourself what it would it take for you to come past it and then work on it.

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