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Husband left job and now showing any interest or love

Asked by Female, 34, Married
My husband was a divorcee and gave the reason for divorce was incompatibility and he was not attracted towards his wife. After marriage few months passed smoothly. Then he left his job in June saying that he will take a break for 2 months to find a better job and get the marriage certificate done. After few months he started saying that he don't feel attracted towards me. Every time he comments about my increased weight. He says that he don't find me sexually attracted and smart. 1 year passed he has neither searched for a job. He lives on my money. He gives my money to his old parents. Our sex life is almost nothing. Because he says he don't feel attracted towards me. This is lowering down my confidence. I'm feeling like leaving him. Many time I told him to go to his parents house as he is living in my house. He says he will go after getting job. Please guide me what do I do?
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Kiran Lakhani
Counselling Psychologist


Thank you for writing in to us. Happy to help.
After going through what you have shared, I wonder how you are managing your life?
I understand you are going through a time where you feel unwanted, and your needs are not satisfied and upon that your husband is a liability that you are managing.

I am assuming that you have shared this with your in-laws and you haven't got much help from that side as well. How about taking 2 days off and you going to your parents home and getting time to have a new perspective to your situation? Do you think you can do that?
Think about what you want out of your life and how you would like to live your life?
Once you get answer to above question you might want to weigh in the options you have.

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