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Spouse does not want to stay in touch with in-laws

Asked by Male, 36, Married
My spouse does not want me to stay in touch with my parents and brother. She has refused to let my parents visit our infant daughter and she lives with her parents. There were disagreements between our families during the marriage ceremonies.
Answer
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Garima
Counseling Psychologist

It seems like your spouse has taken the disagreements during your ceremony a little strongly. It is possible that she felt offended strongly and that's why she doesn't want you or your daughter maintain any relationship with your family.

I think talking to your wife about what your family means to you might help, of course not to make it look like your marriage is less important, but that those relationships mean a lot to you as well.
Despite the disagreements, the two of you ended up married and the ceremonies are long over. Your wife is still dwelling in the past and letting your future as a family get affected in the process.
Interact with your wife and get her to see that your family is important to you as well and that your child should have a chance to know her grandparents and uncle.
Trying to make her understand would work more than accusing her for her actions and behavior.
If there is sourness between the families/ your wife and your family, a simple, well-meaning conversation can solve a lot of issues. If your parents can also hop on board and try to mend fences then you can arrange for a conversation to take place between both families or your wife and your parents, and clear the air around the misunderstandings and issues. You will have to be a careful moderator here as these conversations often turn nasty very quickly.

However, if both your wife and your parents can sort their differences keeping your well-being in mind, things should slowly start building over time.

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