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His Grand-father delaying our arrange marriage approval. I am upset!

Asked by Female, 33, Single
I am a 33-year-old female. I am going through an arranged marriage process from one of the matrimonial sites, a guy have expressed interest in me and have called my father for the marriage proposal. My father asked for his kundali which had matched. Then, the guy has no father so he asked my father to talk to his Nanaji. My father have a talk with his nanaji. Nanaji said if both of them say yes then there is no question of delay. So it's a positive sign. My father passed my number to the guy. He called me and on day one, things were going well. We talked for a month and I liked the guy and I felt he too liked me. We planned to meet, we met. We shared positives things and finally said yes. Now my father called his nanaji to proceed further. His Nanaji asked for our native place's address and contact number of our relatives. We co-operated accordingly. Then my father on a weekly basis did follow up work, after a month he said, he needs 2 to 3 months. My father was doubtful as to why the things are being dragged. Later I called the guy even he was surprised. He said he will talk to his nanaji. He did not call after that. My dad called him and he said his nanaji had asked for 2 months time. My father said at least he should tell the reason for delay of 2 months. For that the guy said he cannot ask his nanaji the reason. My dad was bit dissapointed. I called him he said the same thing to me as well. I felt bad and sent him a message. The next day he called me and said it was just for my verification. Then he sent me linked in invite which I accepted he signaled that he is interested in me. Now it was almost 4 months and his nanaji had not decided and it went dragged. The guy earlier also had said he is practical and direct and in the mean time I lost my mother which I informed him. He said he had asked his nanaji to take decision whatever it is, and not to drag the issue. His Nanaji is still delaying and I really liked the guy, he too is interested in me; his nanaji being the reason, things are not moving forward. I am very upset. Please suggest
Thumb sneha jayagopal

Dear Writer, thank you for writing to us. I am sorry to hear about your mother's passing. With the arranged marriage process I instead it must be a confusing and hurtful time as well. I take it that this man and you are both interested in each other. His grandfather is causing a delay in moving things ahead. To not know the reason must be frustrating. It's important in situations like this to take a firm stand. Either this guy takes a stand and takes a decision, or you have to take a decision. Ask yourself whether you can wait for him if it seems worth it? Do you trust him? Giving yourself and this guy a deadline will prevent this situation from dragging on. It is only making you more upset to not have any clarity. If it works out then great and if not then you might have to accept it and move on. At least you will know which direction to move in. It's your life and future and you need to take back control. You can make things clear instead.
Please message back to let me know what you think. We are here for you. Regards.

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