Others

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Others Asked by female, 29 years. married

Issues with critic parents

I wanted to discuss my relationship with my parents. More importantly about why I react the way I do when I'm with them. They are very loving and affectionate. But they are also highly critical. Their criticism brings out the worst in me and everything becomes ugly afterward. I'm worried about...

Hello Writer, Thank you for contacting the askmile team with your concerns about your relationship with your parents. We do discuss matters relating to family experience and you are in the right place for seeking help. You are worried about the quality of interactions between you and your parents. They are very loving and affectionate people. However, you are reacting to their controlling behavior. I do agree when parents criticize children all the time what you can expect is reaction behaviors. I do understand how you are deeply disturbed with this issue. However, you are seeking a...
Others Asked by male, 29 years. single

Unable to find a girl with the criteria decided by family within our community for marriage

I am looking for a girl to marry, but I am very confused to decide as to how to select and my family too has some basic criteria and I am unable to find someone who can fulfill. Criteria are good looks, education at least a BE/Mtech/MCA/MSc. If she is a software professional then it will be good...

Dear Writer, thank you for writing to us. I understand you are looking for a life partner who meets your criterias. Finding a perfect partner who meets all your requirements​ is based on luck and time. You have to think about what your expectations from a marriage are. Think about things like compatibility and shared interests, personal and professional goals etc. Also think about what are the things you can compromise with. Just like how you have your criterias the opposite side will have their own set of criterias. A marriage is also a relationship. You need to be sure of what you want...
Others Asked by male, 38 years. married

My friendship turns futile and a left with a sense of guilt

Hello, I had a rifted friendship, it turned so worse that she complained to HR and the HR took internal action which resulted in my career at stake and I lost my friend too. I am too depressed and I feel guilty of hurting her. Kindly help

I understand you are very upset about your broken friendship and your guilt in having hurt her. If comfortable could you tell me what led to this situation? Also can you tell me more about yourself as an individual? It will help me understand you better and guide you accordingly. Please message back to continue discussing. Regards
Others Asked by male, 22 years. single

Marriage within extended family members, is that a feasible act?

I want to marry my maternal cousin, we both are in love and we are Christians. Can we marry each other? The problem is there are no such marriages like marrying mothers sister's daughter but we can marry mother's brother daughter or father's sister's daughter, but we can't marry mother's sister's...

Dear Writer, Thank you for contacting the askmile team with your interest and love for your maternal cousin whom you want to marry. It is very painful if someone comes with the view that you cannot marry you love. It would break both of your hearts. There are many different types of customs and practices regarding the various groups and sub-groups in this country. In some quarters cross cousin marriages are not permitted while in some others it is encouraged. You have not seen any marriage in your family or community with maternal cousin. This makes you think it is not permitted. It is...
Others Asked by male, 24 years. single

How to have a goal and stay motivated all the time? I am clueless

I don't have an ultimate goal in life and I don't know what I want. For this reason, I am not motivated towards work. I did my graduation from one of the best colleges and I am known to be a smart guy at work. Problem is that right now I am not motivated towards work for some reason and I am not...

Dear writer, thank you for writing in. I understand you are feeling clueless right now. So lets try and put things in perspective. To have a goal you need to start thinking about what you see yourself doing down the line. Also what is your personal definition of having goals. Is it succes, is it accomplishing your tasks?? Think about what interests you and if they allign with what you have studied so far. If they don't then that's fine too. Start thinking about what will get you up. Are you experiencing lethargy at work? It will help you to know that it is impossbile to stay motivated all...
Others Asked by female, 35 years. single

I m 35 and single. Should I join some religious institutions since I can't be staying alone through out my life

I m single . I m not sure if ll be married . M in mid thirties . Can you guide if I have to join some religious institutions since I can't be staying alone thourougt life . I'm really bothered of the insecurity and our society will not allow a single female to live happily. What should I really...

Dear User7188, Before we proceed, I would like to know if your single status is one of choice or circumstance. I would also want to know more about you, in order to take this forward. As I understand, being single isn't a crime or taboo. What matters most is, are you happy with your status or do you wish to change it? Please get back to me and we will take this forward. Warm regards. Arunita Biswas
Others Asked by male, 35 years. married

Slow recovery after fissure surgery. Can't cope up and stay positive

I underwent fissure surgery recently and now recover period is on. But I think recovery is very slow and I am becoming negative about it. I am facing it difficult to cope up and stay positive. What should I do about this?

Dear Writer, I appreciate your writing to us. I understand you had a fissure surgery recently and post-op care can be taxing. With fissure surgeries there's no falling back on excercises to aid your recovery either. It can become a huge demotivater to find your movements restricted while being in a lot of discomfort and pain. But do not be disheartened for while your recovery takes time and may even seem discouraging, it is still a recovery. Slowly but surely you are getting better. Although it may not feel like it, your age is also another factor that works in your favour. You already know...
Others Asked by male, 24 years. single

Affair with a Muslim girl and her family is looking for another alliance

I am a 24-year-old boy from a Hindu Family. I am in an affair with a Muslim girl from last 8 years. Now, her family members are trying to get her married to some other guy. They didn't know about our affair. What are the options that we can work on?

Dear writer, thanks for writing in. It's good that you are aware of what your options are. Since you both are clearly not in favour of eloping are you then keen on marrying each other right away or in good time? Focus on the option that is available, that being confronting her parents. Regardless of their agreeing to this, the only way forward is to let them know. Again, before you even approach her parents you have to be sure that you and your girlfriend are on the same page and are just as committed to each other even when circumstances are tough. I am assuming your family is in know...
Others Asked by male, 22 years. single

My girlfriend is overthinking, confused about our relationship

I met a girl around 7-8 months ago. It was back when we started job. She was a fresher like me. I got to know her, became good friends. We used to hang out together most of the time. And to be honest, I started liking her. She asked me about this a couple of times but I denied. Wasn't sure if she...

Dear writer, I appreciate your having written in. I understand that you are worried that you might get hurt and just now you are very unsure about the fate of your relationship. When you say that you think your friend is overthinking things or that you don't want her to feel obliged into being with you; you might be doing a little bit of overthinking yourself. You also said this might be your potential first relationship and although everyone's got to have a first at some point; i think that you might be letting your inexperience so to speak turn into an insecurity. Firstly you need to...
Others Asked by female, 27 years. single

Relationship issues with a guy

Relationship . If the guy really cares for me and what I need to do

Hi, I understand that you have confusion about whether to take relationship further or not and in any case how? in your case with a person who is showing affection towards you, it could be complicated to make this decision We would be able to help you with this if you can write back to us with more details about relationship and describe incidents so that we can help you think this through Do write back to us
Others Asked by male, 26 years. single

Unsure about future

I am depressed in my life .what to do in my future.

Greetings for the day :) There are several ways to come to that diagnose, I am sure that, if you speak with someone regarding it then you can work around it. Do get in touch with me, we will see how to organize and plan for your future :) Thanks.
Others Asked by female, 27 years. married

Will yoga help focus on studies?

Thank you very much for answering.Actually my father also been suffering from depression so m really scared as to will I be able to get rid of my depression.My passion is research in life science infact my goal is to pursue phd in the same.strangely I am not even touching my life science books...

Depression is a hard battle but not impossible to beat. Everyone deals with depression differently. Just because your father still finds it difficult to cope with, does not mean you won't find a way either. Have hope and keep fighting against it. Doing yoga has a number of benefits. It would boost mood,reduce stress, reduce insomnia and help you to relax as well. However, it would not directly help you to motivate yourself to work towards your goal of pursuing your phd. That kind of motivation has to come from you. That being said, you should know that everyone has phases where they're...
Others Asked by female, 15 years. single

Need help for mental health issue

i need help from a counciller, i am mentally skrewed up !!

Depression drains your energy, hope, and drive, making it difficult to do what you need to feel better. But while overcoming depression isnt quick or easy, its far from impossible. You cant just will yourself to snap out of it, but you do have more control than you realizeeven if your depression is severe and stubbornly persistent. The key is to start small and build from there. Feeling better takes time, but you can get there if you make positive choices for yourself each dayReach out and stay connected to supportive people , Do things that make you feel goodeven when you dont feel like it...
Others Asked by female, 23 years. single

Wrong to make male friends in absence of females at workplace?

I am a fresher in my job! and their are no girls in my team and I am not able to mingle up with girls in other team because of ego crashing. Is it wrong to make a male friend?

Greetings for the day! Work place can be super difficult initally for anyone and I can understand that you are also facing a lot of difficulties initially. Give it sometime everything will become alright, and things will settle in for you, until then let me tell one thing for sure that, it is not at all wrong to make friends in any gender. As long as you know the limits that you need to maintain, so that others don't receive any unwanted communication from you of any sort. If you want to discuss more about workplace problems, then don't at all worry and you can message me and we can...
Others Asked by male, 33 years. single

Any side effects of taking 2 emergency contraceptive pills in 72 hours?

My girl friend has taken two emergency contraception in 72 hours.do I need to worry about her health in coming hours and in future. Would she suffer because of the pills

Greetings, It is certainly advised to take contraceptive pill according to prescription and also if you referring to one of those 'I-Pills', those are different from the contraceptive pills. Get it checked by a professional. Thanks.